PSLE : Bullies

“Why did you defy me? Henry, the big and burly thirteen-year-old roared at Roan, the timid ten year old.  Roan trembled and shivered. Henry pulled Roan up by his shirt and flung him like he were a feather towards the wall. “Bang!” Roan hit the wall and lay sprawled on the floor. Bruised, he then made a hasty retreat and ran off.

I stared in horror at such wicked meanness. Being new to the school, I was also a small and short boy. Henry was infamous for bullying.  I heard he was eyeing to make me his next victim. I decided to put a stop to it.

The next day, as I walked along the quiet corridor leading to the staff room, I had a nagging feeling at the back of my mind that someone was tailing me.   I tried to keep wild thoughts at bay and I quickened my pace and walked briskly to the staff room. Still, the feeling of being stalked kept bugging me. I turned around just to be sure.  All I saw was a long row of doors along the grey corridor. I quickened my footsteps as I made my way to the staff room. 

As I stepped into the staff room, the air conditioner blasted me with cold air. It was freezing rather than cooling.  A strong wave of coffee invaded my nostrils as I stared at the teachers marking tirelessly at a long table. I walked past the maze of tables trying to find my discipline mistress. I found her typing on her computer keyboard. 

“Err…Miss …Miss Lim,” I muttered out. Miss Lim peeled her eyes off her computer and looked at me, I straightened my posture and told her about the incident about Henry bullying the kids.

“Thank you, Jerome.  This matter will be looked into immediately,”  Miss Lim assured me. I thanked my teacher and walked out of the staff room, not knowing that my conversation had been overheard crisp and clear.

As I made my way carrying my stone-heavy bag, I trudged my way under the scorching sun. As the weather was so hot, I decided to take the shortcut home. As I walked along the deserted alley leading to my lovely home, I suddenly heard footsteps behind me.

My gosh!  It was not only Henry but his infamous sidekicks, Brad and Loki, as well.   My heart was pounding fast. Brad walked up to me like greased lightning and tripped me over. I was then hauled up and slammed onto a wall. Henry stomped up to me.

“What did you just do?” Henry snarled.

“What did you do?” Henry shouted, scaring me out of my wits.  

“I…I did not do anything” I spluttered.

“You did not do anything…As if!” Brad shouted, “I overheard everything!”

Cold sweat broke out on my forehead.  Realisation dawned on me that they knew everything. What should I do?  My mind raced for a solution. I was jolted from my train of thoughts when Loki suddenly pushed me to the floor, raising his hand to punch me, but Henry stopped him.

I looked up in hope. Was he going to forgive me? 

He hesitated for a moment and asked Brad to back away with a smirk on his face. He reached out a hand to help me up and I grabbed it. Out of the blue, his free hand raised up and punched me squarely on my nose. I winced in pain and as I tumbled to the floor again in agony. They took my bag and found my brand new Adidas watch.

“No…” I screamed as I stood up, and lunged for the watch.

Henry could not care less. He took the watch and threw it to the floor, stomping on it which smashed it into pieces. Indignant anger engulfed me as I delivered him a punch to his stomach but it left nothing except a tiny bruise. Loki and Brad laughed and jumped on me, hitting and punching me as if I were their punching bag. I laid on the floor, waiting in eternity for this nightmare to be over.

Suddenly, thundering footsteps stomped towards us. The bullies looked up in horror.  It was Miss Lim. How did she know where I was? It did not matter anymore. Justice would be meted out swiftly and the bullies would get their just desserts.

PSLE: Vandalism

“Stupid! Stupid principal!” I let out a string of expletives as I walked towards the school gate fuming. I rammed my fist into a nearby tree, causing my hand to swell, but I did not care. I hated that principal. He had caned me because I had dropped my water bottle down from the fourth storey of the school. What's wrong testing the law of gravity? As I walked under the sweltering heat, I felt my anger rise up within me. Fury was practically radiating off my pores and my eyes flashed in simmering anger.

Out of the blue, I saw a black BMW parked near the school gate. I recognized it straight away. It was my principal’s car. Suddenly, a terrible thought crossed my mind, and an impromptu giggle escaped my lips as I envisioned his car covered in graffiti. A sly smile spread across my thin lips as I went to a nearby shop and brought a few cans of spray paint. Time to display my artistic talent.  Woohoo!  I sprayed nasty words noticeably in red.  It read “Go Die.” 

I sprayed the car again and again, covering a coat of paint with another. When I was done, the once nice and beautiful BMW was now colourful and looked like it belonged to a five year old girl. I was not done. I took out my keys and scratched the metal doors and I even broke one of his wipers. It bended at a horrific angle. I stared incredulity at my “masterpiece”.  I was so proud of it!

"What is happening here?” a loud voice startled me. Turning around, I saw my arch-enemy, Tom, a prefect in front of me. He broke into a wide grin and sneered, “Well, well, well. Let’s see what the principal will think about this.”

I grimaced in horror.  If he told the principal, I would be in hot water again. I could not let the truth spill out. “Arghh!” I growled before lunging at Tom and delivered a punch to his nose. “Tell and you'll be dead meat!” I snarled.

He rolled his eyes!  That made me snap!  I rushed towards him and delivered blow after blow at him like he was a potato sack. He fought back. He swung his arm around desperately to hit me. One of his flying fists hit my ear which rang uncontrollably and I groaned in pain. Tom was small but he could definitely punch very well.

“What is happening here? Who did this to my car?” I froze momentarily. Lady Luck was not with me as Tom’s accusing finger pointed in my direction. It was THE PRINCIPAL.  Puffs of smoke emerged from his nose and ears. His angry glare bored through me like a laser beam. I thought I should flee but I would be fried more than ever. His face turned as red as molten lava. He dragged me all the way across the school to the office and told me to sit down.  I stared at all the canes hanging on the wall.  Not again!?

A wave of regret engulfed me. If only… if only I could have contained my anger.  The many “if only and what ifs” flooded into my mind. If only I could turn back time, I would not have done it. However, what was done could never be undone. The embarrassment of being dragged across the school by the principal burned deeply into my crimson cheeks. Hoping the principal would show me some mercy, I bowed my head in shame and waited for the dreadful punishment.

PSLE: Responsibility

Japheth never knew what responsibility was.  He was highly irresponsible and always pushed the blame on others.  However, an incident on a fateful day took place and it has changed everything.  Japheth has become a very reliable boy but he has paid a heavy price for it…

It was evening time and Mother was cooking in the kitchen.  The smell of curry lingered in the air and Japheth was not hungry at all.  He was playing Clash Royale on his mobile phone and food was definitely not on his mind. 

“Japheth, Mum needs to run to the shop to get more coconut milk.  Could you be responsible enough to look after the fire for me?” Mother’s voice asked.  Japheth nodded without even looking up.  He was too engrossed to give a reply.  With that, Mother darted out of the door and locked the gate.

Meanwhile, the curry was boiling furiously.  The heat was intense and a light burnt smell began to permeate the house.  Japheth noticed it but he could not care less and continued playing.  A few minutes later, a loud crackling sound was heard and he was breathing in wisps of smoke.  Curiosity got the better of him and he finally decided to check what had happened.

As he marched into the kitchen, he saw the whole pot of curry on fire!  The flames were jumping about in the pot.   Oh no!  His lack of responsibility had gotten him into trouble!  He decided to act quickly and filled a bucket of water, ready to put out the fire.

It was a really bad move!  The splashing water caused a loud kaboom! and tossed him a few meters away.  Japheth’s eyes widened with horror and his jaws dropped.  His face blanched with trepidation and panic filled his heart.  He wished he watched the fire closely but he was too late to regret. 

By this time, half of the kitchen was engulfed with flames and the paint on the wall started melting. Thick black smoke was spreading fast.  The kitchen was burning like a charred chicken and the rampant inferno was spreading fast.   Stricken by terror, his heart pounded like an African drum.  He ran to the gate, trying to escape but the gate was locked and there was no key in the house!

“Someone, please save me!” he hollered and walled aloud.  He never knew that his irresponsibility would have landed him in such a dire state.  Fortunately, a resident had already notified the fire brigade. Within minutes, the sirens wailed down the street.  A fire engine had arrived and some heroic firemen broke the gate and doused the fire immediately.  Japheth’s immense anxiety instantly turned to relief when the flames were completely extinguished.

By the time Japheth’s mother was back, the kitchen was burned down.  Mother found out what had happened and gave Japheth the mother of all dressing-downs.  It was pointless for there was no way Japheth could turn back the clock.  However, the boy learned an important lesson.  He finally understood the importance of being responsible even for the most minute task.  It was definitely a heavy price to pay for such a valuable lesson.

PSLE: Kindness

It was Grandmother’s birthday. “Mom, let’s get a cheese cake for Grandma,” Jenson suggested, his chocolate eyes sparkling behind his nerdy glasses as he pointed to a lovely blueberry cheesecake on the display rack. They were in a busy bakery, the aromatic smell lingering in the air.

“That is so thoughtful of you,” Jenson’s mother smiled and patted his curly mop of black hair.

Immediately, she made her purchase and together, they left the crowded bakery.

As soon as they stepped out of the entrance, they heard a high-pitched ‘argh!’, followed by a loud thud.  Curiosity got the better of them and the mother and his son decided to head towards the scene.  A few feet away was a frail elderly lady lying sprawled on the cold concrete floor, wailing in pain.  “Ouch!  This is so painful!” she groaned as her face squashed into the shape of a wrinkled sour plum.  A deep gash was on her forehead.  She was embarrassed and clearly in shock.

Jenson felt so sorry for the elderly lady and turned to his mother, saying, “Oh no!  Mom, it is no fun falling in front of a busy crowd.”  Jenson looked around and spotted a kiosk selling fresh, sweet-smelling flowers.  A brilliant idea struck him.  Why not get a flower for the poor lady?

“Mom, can I use my pocket money to buy this lady a stalk of daisy?” Jenson suggested as his chubby index finger pointed towards a pail full of colourful daisies.

Mother readily agreed and gave him some notes.  Jenson ran to the kiosk and chose the prettiest daisy.  However, he was too shy to give it to her.

By this time, the paramedics had arrived and was trying to render the lady first aid.  Jenson was very intimidated by the blood and the medical equipment. He wanted to give the flower to the lady but he was too self-conscious.

Jenson’s mother smiled and suggested, “Why don’t we give this flower together?” 

As they approached the lady, Jenson gently placed the flower on her lap and whispered, “I hope you have a speedy recovery.”

The old lady started tearing and replied, “Thank you very much!  You are a really kind boy!”  Despite being badly shaken and hurt, she bent over and gave Jenson a light kiss on his forehead.  Jenson blushed pink instantly.

As the paramedics pushed the elderly lady in a stretcher towards the ambulance, Jenson and his mother bade farewell.  Jenson’s mother held Jenson’s hand gently and they walked towards the carpark.  “Jenson, I guess Grandma will be very pleased to hear your story of kindness,” Jenson’s mother smiled. As the setting sun cast its lovely tangerine rays on Jenson, his smiling face shone like an angel.

PSLE: Fire

It was a quiet night.  My sister and I were at home doing our homework as my parents were out on an errand. 

All of a sudden, we heard raised voices and a strange smell started to linger in the air.  What was going on?  I decided to investigate and looked out of the windows.  To my horror, I caught sight of a group of passers-by looking upwards.  I realized that my neighbour’s kitchen was on fire.  Thick black and fluffy columns of smoke were billowing out of the windows.  My mouth fell agape and my face went as pale as a sheet. 

“Jane!  Let’s get out of here!” my nasal voice screeched as I called out to my younger sister.  There was panic in her eyes and she was trembling like a leaf.  By this time, the burning smell had invaded every nook and corner.  Realising how dire the situation was, we decided to make our way to the stairway - fast. 

Just as we were about to descend the flight of steps, I froze in my tracks.  I suddenly remembered that Grandma was asleep next door.  I told Jane to run for safety while I returned to get Grandma. Jane was reluctant to leave without me but there was no other choice.  

I rushed to her main door and banged hard.  No matter how hard I tried, it was to no avail for my grandma was a sound sleeper and she was also hard of hearing too.  A few neighbours were scurrying for safety and they urged me to leave with them.  However, I was adamant not to leave. Grandma was in danger!

By this time, the burning inferno was spreading and the smoke was suffocating me.  I felt like a roasted pig and I could hardly breathe.  In the nick of time, the door sprang open and Grandma looked perplexed as she stared at me in puzzlement.  Without a word, I grabbed her hand to make our escape.  The roar of the fire was deafening and the raging flames were melting the paint on the walls.  All the exits were blocked!  Beads of perspiration dotted our foreheads and waves of dizziness swamped us, making us sway.  Grandma’s face had turned deathly sallow and I was worried sick.  Standing behind the parapet, we waited desperately for rescue to come.

Fortunately, we heard the wailing siren of the fire brigade and the firemen immediately sprang into action and sprayed the monstrous fire with powerful, snake-like hoses.  Seeing that time was the essence, they also set up a safety net and were encouraging us to leap onto it.  I insisted that my grandma jumped first before I did.  She finally leapt after some coaxing.  I was next.  Holding my breath, I jumped and landed safely on the bouncy safety net.  I gave Grandma a big bear hug. Tears slipped down my sooty face as relief swept over me.  I was grateful that we had emerged from this ordeal unscathed. 

As for the fire, the efficiency of the firemen was astounding.  Within half an hour, the inferno was completely extinguished.  Grandma was prescribed bed rest and I was hailed as the hero of the family. 

PSLE: Pickpockets

The shopping mall was buzzing with shoppers.  It was as busy as an ant’s nest.  It was Christmas eve and everyone was in a festive mood as Christmas carols played melodiously from the loudspeakers.

I was shopping with Mom the entire day and my feet felt sore like crazy.  I decided to sit at a metallic bench to take a breather while Mom continued her shopping frenzy.  I waited and waited, getting really bored.  I spotted two children, an older boy, about eight, and a little girl, probably less than four.  Hand in hand, they looked like they were looking for someone. 

Just then, I spotted a familiar figure.  My mum.  She was waving at me, eager to show me her purchase.  As she was rushing towards me, a girl lost her balance and fell just before her.   It was the same girl I had seen earlier. Immediately, big fat tears rolled down her cheeks.  My mother felt bad and quickly helped her to her feet.  Her older brother was behind my mom and did not even bother to help.  The girl thanked my mom and the two kids sped off.

Upon seeing Mom laden with shopping bags, I sulked and pulled a long grumpy face, folding my arms in frustration. “Sorry to make you wait. Hmm… How about a large cup of Lao Lao yogurt with your favorite white chocolate chips?” she suggested and gave a wink.  I fell for it right away.  My eyes immediately lit up in delight!  How could I turn down such a tantalizing offer? All the wait was well worth it.  We went straight to the yogurt store without delay.

As we were queueing, Mother dug into her Louis Vuitton handbag, trying to fish out her Chanel wallet.  “God, where is my wallet?”  Her face blanched white as all her cash and cards were inside as well.

I looked around and saw, to my surprise, the same siblings savouring a cup of Lao Lao as well.  In the brother’s hand was a Chanel wallet.  My goodness!  How could he afford a Chanel?  It was a limited edition one.  Could it be Mom’s?  Something inside me clicked suddenly.  I put two and two together and realised that the pair was a pickpocket duo.  The young girl was a decoy and the older one was the thief.

My mom spotted the two and must have realised it too. Immediately, she marched towards them and bellowed, “You useless midgets!  How dare you steal from me!”  The kids turned ashen-faced and were trembling in fright.  They were caught red handed!

The older boy came forward and stammered, “Here... is... your wallet!  Could you give us a second chance and let us go, please?”  The children clasped their hands together and pleaded with their doleful eyes.

Mom checked and realised the contents were all intact except for some loose change.  They could have spent it on the Lao Lao yogurts.  Just then, her phone rang.  It was Dad chasing to meet her at the car park.  Mom decided to let them off after a stern lecture.  After all, it was just a few dollars and they were so young.

As we hurried off, I turned to look at them once more.  I sincerely hoped that the children would turn over a new leaf.   In a far distance, the girl had tumbled onto the floor once more.  They had struck again and gotten their next victim.  I shook my head and sighed in disbelief.  Well, I guess, a leopard cannot change its spots.  

  

Image source: https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/x/pick-pocket-505392.jpg

PSLE: Terror Strikes

The headlines screamed:  Terrorist attack kills scores outside National Stadium.   As I stared at the headlines, tears streaked down my cheeks as memories of what had happened came flooding back…

“Wow, Dad, did you see how Fandi kicked?  I want to be a star striker just like him!”  I spoke exuberantly.  “Yes, my son will be the greatest footballer and I will get to see it!”  Dad nodded furiously, trying to look serious and not to laugh.  I blushed as we made our way out of the crowded stadium.  We were at a soccer match between the Lion Bravo and the Cheetah Power.  Spectators were all marching out towards the MRT station, discussing the game and the players’ performance enthusiastically. 

As we crossed the quiet road, an ear-deafening ‘vroom’ disrupted the silence of the night.  When we turned around, we spotted an enormous white truck speeding towards the crowd.  Everyone started scuttling off like terrified sheep escaping from a ferocious bear. Chaos broke out.  Shrieks of terror sliced through the air. The situation was tumultuous!  Unfortunately, it was too late.  No one could outrun the speeding truck and men were falling down like bowling pins, lying sprawled on the tarmac ground.

 

For a fraction of a second, I stood rooted to the ground, stunned at the shocking spectacle.  It was a night of terror!  The truck continued zigzagging and steering directly towards the sea of people.  They were all frantically trying to save their loved ones but the unstoppable truck was trying to mow down the maximum number of innocent victims.    It was definitely terrorism on purpose! He was on a rampage!  Such atrocious depravity!  People were falling down like dead flies and their bodies were strewn all over the road as their crimson blood stained it red. 

As I stared in wide-eyed horror, I felt a sudden push from behind. It was Dad, pushing me out of harm’s way of the approaching truck.  However, at that critical moment, he could not escape in time. When I looked back, Dad was already crushed under the gargantuan wheel of the truck.  He was squashed like an insignificant bug.

“Dad!”  I cried aloud.  I could not believe my eyes!  How could someone be so wicked and cold-blooded?    My heart throbbed with intense grief.  In total state of distraught bemusement, I knelt down beside my dad’s motionless body and wept hysterically.  Heartbroken, I refused to leave him and run for safety.

That was a bad move.  The terrorist hopped off his truck and started spraying his bullets at the survivors trying to finish them off.  I tried to dodge but a bullet hit me. I slumped onto the ground, my head spinning non-stop as excruciating pain shot through my body in waves.  Finally, darkness overcame me and I lost consciousness.

When I awoke, I found myself in an unfamiliar room, swathed in bandages.  Mom was sobbing beside me.  My dad had passed away. Mom told me that a bullet had smashed my spine and I have become paralyzed from the waist down. I was devastated.  Despite the pain I was going through, nothing was more unbearable than the loss of my beloved father.  As for the villain, it was reported that he was killed by the police, his body riddled with bullets.  He deserved it!  

Despite my immobility, I vow not to be crushed by the terror of terrorism but to have an indomitable courage to triumph over such villainous wickedness. 

Image source: 

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2015/11/14/16/2E70C67F00000578-3317776-image-m-132_1447516923153.jpg

PSLE: An Eventful Camp Trip

Going for a camp trip always sounds like fun.  I had one two years ago.  It was definitely an eventful one.  In fact, it is so memorable that even now, my fellow scouts still tease me about it...

The night was as dark as a dungeon, except for the dim rays of moonlight that filtered past the opening flap of the tent.  It was silent and tranquil except for the occasional breeze that weaved among the leaves and made them rustle.  It was a survival camp for the scouts and they learnt how to live in the wild.  Everyone was exhausted after a flurry of activities in the day and I was fast asleep in a tent with three other boys. 

Unfortunately, we had uninvited company.  Ssss, ssss. A malicious snake had stealthily slithered in. It was a gargantuan python as long as a van.  Its beady eyes darted from side to side as if it was looking for a meal.  A juicy meal.   

In the midst of my deep slumber, I felt something heavy.  Unknown to me, the insidious creature had started to twirl itself around my legs and I was not even aware of it. “Hey, get off me,” I cried, thinking  that it was my friend.  But there was no response.  I opened my eyes and saw my friends with a torchlight staring at me as if they had just seen a ghost. 

“What’s wrong, guys?” I asked, rubbing my bleary eyes. Thiru, with his face as white as a sheet, curled his trembling finger and pointed at my feet.  I stared in dismal unbelief when my eyes met the glinting eyes of a humongous python, its tongue flicking non-stop.   Temperature immediately dropped to sub-zero.  I froze in paramount fear as a chill instantly ran down my spine. 

“Ahhhh! Get off me, you monster,” I yelled, trying to wriggle violently out of its tight grip.  My every move incited its wrath even more and it constricted further.  Oh no!  My legs were getting numb and the reptile’s toned-bronze frame had already managed to slip further up my torso.

“Someone, help me,” I pleaded, my tears falling liberally down my cheeks.  No one dared to move a muscle. Everyone cowered behind Joken.  With some hesitation, he decided to ram punches onto the elongated snake with his clenched fists.  His knuckles turned red and painful and his face was flushing pink with fatigue.  However, no matter how hard he tried, the adamant snake refused to budge.  It was crushing the life out of me.

“Hey guys, let’s think of Plan B.  Let’s get the camp master’s help!” Joken suggested. The three boys ran to inform the camp master, Coach Gabriel, panting breathlessly as they sped. 

Alarmed by the report of the trio, the camp master, together with his assistants, grabbed his bag and dashed to help.  By this time, all the scouts had gathered and circled outside the tent.  Everyone was on tenterhooks, their eyes fixating on me.

Coach Gabriel tried hard to pry the snake away with the help of his two stout assistants but it was in vain.  In desperation, he dug out a penknife and started stabbing the snake furiously.  The stubborn snake finally relented and loosened its grip and slowly slithered away.  Everyone was overcome with relief.

Phew!  It was a close shave.  Except for some minor injuries and leg numbness, I made a complete recovery within days and was back to my exuberant self.  It was definitely an eventful camp for me.  I was saved from the clutches of death and have definitely learnt to value life more than ever. 

PSLE: A Surprise Present

Joelle was troubled.  Her best friend, Peiying, was tearing and she felt so sad on seeing it.  Peiying was staring at her old, tattered school shoes.  It was the sports meet the next day and how was she going to even win in any race?  The holes in her shoes were gaping and the soles were slippery.  Filled with melancholy, Peiying’s tears brimmed in her eyes as she let out a sigh of resignation.

Joelle wanted to do something for her but what should she do? She racked her brain and finally decided to give her an awesome surprise.  A new pair of shoes!  It would probably cost her all her savings but she knew it was the right thing to do.  Mom always taught her to look out for the needs of others.  Since the sports meet was the next day, there was no time to lose.  She rushed home and emptied her savings and visited the mall near her home.

At the mall, the shoe shop had all the latest sports shoes on display.  They were all beckoning her to buy them.  Exuberance filled her heart.  Which one would Peiying like?  Unfortunately for her, they were all out of her meagre budget.  “Is there all you have?  I need to buy a pair for my best friend,” Joelle asked in an almost pleading voice.

The shop assistant caught her hint and smiled.  He immediately showed her the cheapest pair of Nike running shoes and offered to give her another ten per cent off since it was the last pair on display.  It was a bargain she could not refuse.  Joelle beamed with immense joy. With an empty wallet and a pair of decent shoes for her best friend, Joelle almost danced as she made her way home.

The  next day, the sports day finally arrived.  The stadium was packed with students.  As eager as a beaver, Joelle craned her neck, looking high and low edgily for her best friend.  Her sparking white teeth sparkled when she spotted her in a crowd of athletes and jostled and squeezed herself there.

“Peiying, I have a surprise present for you,” she cried out above the din and shoved the brand new shoes into her arms.  Before Peiying could even reply, Joelle was dashed off back to the spectator stand.  What was that?  Peiying opened the gift box and her mouth fell agape in surprise.  Was it a hallucination? A pair of Nike shoes?  She was taken aback by the gleaming new shoes which were a perfect fit.  What an incredible surprise!  She was stunned speechless.  Tears fell like beads from a snapped bracelet.  Since her race was the next in line, she wasted no time at all and wore her new shoes in eager anticipation for the race.

Bang! The starter gun blasted and Peiying took off like the wind. She ran like there was no tomorrow.  Her heart pounded against her ribs as droplets of perspiration slipped from her porcelain skin.  She was determined to win and give her best friend a surprise gift as well.  Finally, she crossed the finishing line and won by a large margin. Joelle felt super proud of her best friend and cheered the loudest at the spectator stand.  It was a memorable moment for both of them.

The next day, there was a gift box on Joelle’s desk in the classroom.  As Joelle opened it, a card and a gold medal greeted her eyes.  On the card was written:

               

Dearest Jo,

                  Thanks for being a wonderful friend.  Yesterday you gave me the biggest surprise ever and today this is my surprise gift for you. BFF forever.  Muacks!

Love,

P. Y.

PSLE: Writing a great introduction and close for a PSLE composition

Theme: Danger

Original Introduction

It was a balmy day and the water looked as smooth as glass except for the occasional ripples.  Jay intended to explore the river behind his grandmother’s house.

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Writing Techniques: Senses (sound, smell, sight, taste, touch), Appearance + Dressing, Thoughts and Feelings, Hook

It was a balmy day. (2-3 details on how you think a balmy day looks like)  Birds were chirping melodiously on the gnarled tree branches.  Butterflies were already busy fluttering around collecting nectar. The smell of the colourful flowers lingered in the air.  Jay was making his way to the river bank.  His lanky (appearance) legs thumped on the dead leaves, making them crackle.  He smiled (facial expression) as he gazed (do not use ‘see’) at the river.  The greenish (color) water looked as smooth as glass (simile) except for the occasional ripples.  Exuberance (feeling) bubbled in him when he spotted (do not use ‘see’) a boat beside the river bank.  It was going to be a day of adventure.  Little did he know that great danger was looming nearby... 

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Original Conclusion

Suddenly, while Jay was struggling, the whole boat capsized.  Without hesitation, the crocodile immediately attacked Jay’s right leg trying to pull him down into the water.  After that, no one knew where Jay was.

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Revised Climax and Close

The crocodile gave the boat a massive slap with its humongous tail.  The impact was so powerful that the boat overturned and Jay flew off the boat and splashed into the water.  (BODY) Jay was choked by the water that rushed into his mouth and nostrils.  Being a lousy swimmer without a life jacket, he struggled for air.  As if that was not bad enough (THOUGHT), the crocodile lunged (vivid verb) towards him and opened his gigantic jaws wide.   Lines of razor-sharp teeth glinted in the sun. With a loud snap, Jay’s right leg was completely ripped off. Blood immediately turned the river crimson red. After a struggle, the splashes and ripples soon turned feeble and became no more.

The day turned dark and dreary.  The birds no longer sang.  The butterflies hid themselves.  The smell of death rose like vapour from the ground.  The greenish water looked as smooth as glass once more.  No one knew where Jay was.

The river awaits its next victim. (Implied Theme)